@keithave the instructions you've got make it look like you're doing everything right -- except I can't see your config and that's probably where it's not working. In particular -- if neo4j doesn't know to look for "graph" where you placed it, then what you'll get is exactly what you see -- it will create a default "neo4j" database instead.
Post the snippet of your neo4j.conf file and I'll try to have a look. The YouTube video is a great idea, I'll look into it.